The 'Up' key always moves north

Reversock

It should've been a normal day. I woke up - normal. Got dressed - normal. Can't find my left sock - normal. Can't find my right sock… Hmmm. Can't find *any* socks. Not so normal.

It must be Chad, my roommate. That guy. I go and bang on his door. I don't care if he's still asleep.
"Chad! Dude, not cool! It's freezing; I need my socks!"

Surprisingly the door opens straight away. Chad's in front of me, looking all kinds of baffled.
"I can't find any of my socks, either. I was just about to come ask you if this was your idea of a joke."
Suddenly, someone was hammering on our door, shouting about socks. We look at each other and go open the door, and then we realize that it's everywhere. The entire dorm is abuzz about missing socks. Nobody has socks. Anywhere.

Right. Time to reverse this situation. Time to put on our big boy pants and set about getting the world's socks back. So come on, let's go. I can show you the way!

BAM! You're in 16th century England. Don't ask how, we don't have time for this. The fate of feet rests in the balance.

Up ahead you see a man attempting to woo a lady. At least, you think that's what he's doing. As you approach them, then woman exclaims, "Oh, William Lee, I have had just about enough of this!" and turns away from the priestly-looking fellow in a huff, as he hurries to catch up to her.

Obviously you have to step in. Otherwise, what did I bring you here for? The only question is, what do you do?

  1. C'mon, you can read the signs. Obviously she's not interested. I mean, she's literally walking away. At this point it's just him being clingy. You take Mr. Lee aside for a brotherly chat and a pint at the nearest pub, and convince him to give the young woman up.
  2. Though it's obvious the lady's not interested, you have a word with her and convince her to give William a chance.
  3. You speak with William and concoct a plan to win the lady's heart. Preferably a needlessly convoluted one.

POW! You're in another place. Maybe still England. It's dreary, so yeah, probably England. Looking around, you see William again, though he's a bit older. He's speaking with another gentleman when suddenly a squad of guardsmen swoop in, shouting. "George Brooks, you are hereby under arrest, for the charge of treason!"

As his colleague is dragged away in chains, William notices you. "Ah, it's you again, with your outlandishly colourful garb," he says, as you walk towards him. "Friend of yours?" you ask him.

"Not as such, no. Business associate. Quite tragic. He was my last hope, really. It seems my invention really is doomed. The queen insists on refusing my patents, and now poor Brooks is off to the gaul."

It is once again up to you to try and give William hope.

  1. "You know, they say that when God closes a door, he opens a window elsewhere."
  2. "Maybe this is God's way of telling you it's time for other pursuits?"
  3. "You know how queens are, my good fellow. You've got to keep at it if you ever want to convince her!"

KAPLOWBANGZBOW! Oh look. It's William again. Hurray, that guy is always so much fun. Once again, you walk up to the morose fellow.

"Ah, it's you again," he says when he sees you, "you always seem to catch me at my worst."

By this point you don't even care much.

You just want your socks. WHERE ARE THE SOCKS??? But still, you sit down to have another chat with the guy, who tells you he is thinking of moving his enterprise out of the Queen's country.

Once more, it is up to you to provide some crucial guidance.

  1. "France! Just… yeah, France. Go to France."
  2. "You should definitely go to Italy. Something about the shape of the place…"
  3. You jot a bunch of country names down on scraps of paper and put them in his cap, telling him to pick one out and go where it says.

The Door Is Open

You've set William Lee on the path of your choice. The by-hinged temporal gateway is now unbarred (that means "the door is open"). All that is left for you to do is to reach it.

Woohoo!

You blink, and all of the sudden you're back in the dorms. No wacky sound effects this time - we're all out. As you look around you, you see everyone crying tears of joy, holding bundles of filthy, sweat-stained socks to their sobbing faces, crying from joy (or from the horrible stench - you're not sure). Yes, you've done it. You have reversed the socktastrophe.

You have set William Lee upon the right path to invent, patent, and popularize his knitting frames, making socks an everyday item all over the world. Forevermore, you will be this world's unsung hero. Be proud! And have warm feet.

Awwww, maaaaan….

Suddenly, you are back in the now. But it's not the now that you wanted. It's not even the now that you left. Hordes of unwashed masses shamble through the streets. The lack of socks has made zombies of them all. You have failed, and humanity has paid the price. Now all that is left is to find a way to survive this sockpocalypse. But without socks, what chance is there, really?